What a great day today has been; spiritually, emotionally, and later – gastronomically. It was a journey that begins and ends with my best friend.
It started yesterday. I had a great day working at home, with no interruptions, I always accomplish so much more than when I am in the office. Shortly after 3:00 PM, by bride and best friend, got home from work. We talked about our short term and long term plans, and agreed upon the actions that we needed to take in both instances. How wonderful to have a partner who is equal in all ways. I love her with all my heart. The day was capped of by watching an outstanding episode of the Sopranos.
Today, I got to sleep in (always good during the winter) and got up at 8:00 AM, had my morning coffee (Starbucks Sumatra, my favorite), and read the paper. I was excited to see that Tiger’s first tournament is the Buick Invitational, and he is going into today leading by four strokes. Beth and I love watching Tiger play, and will get to see him starting at 3:00 PM this afternoon. As always, Sheeba was “hepping” me read the paper.
Right about the time I was finishing the paper, I looked outside and saw that our local turkeys were doing better than just fine – I counted over 50 of them in our back yard. This is one of the reasons we love our homestead, Nutwood Junction. I will put up a picture I took with Beth’s digital when she is home to help me (I have not made the transition to digital yet, I still use 35mm film). Some of the turkeys were so brazen to fly up on the deck (about 16 feet above ground level) to scope out the bird seed (stupid birds :o)). It was very uplifting.
About 11:30 AM, I headed out to run my errands. While I was in the truck, I was planning my itinerary – post office, bank, and grocery shopping. It was so reminiscent of the times I spent with my father growing up, and I knew that he was in the truck with me. My parents divorced when I was 11 years old, but I got to spend every weekend with my Dad. Our routine was to run errands every Saturday morning, with the post office, the bank, and multiple grocery stores the norm (he was a coupon shopper, just like Beth). The memory and the knowledge that he was with me today made me feel glorious.
My Dad died in 1990, very suddenly. However, I am very lucky. There are no regrets and nothing left unsaid. My Dad was my best friend, my business partner, and my role model. Not to say that there were not tough times, and anger over the divorce. But as I grew older, we became closer, and when college and professional life arrived, I truly appreciated the man he was. I know, deep in my soul, that this will also be the case with my children.
Two weeks before he died, I was on a recruiting trip for my company at the time, to my alma mater, the University of Illinois. I took the weekend to visit my Dad, and we fell into one of our other routines. We spent the afternoon watching football, cooked dinner together, and then watched a movie that evening – complete with our huge bowls of ice cream. We talked long into the night. By the way, all these things are things I do with my current best friend – although we often substitute wine for ice cream.
Even though his death was many years ago, the pain is still there. As I type this, I am crying because of the things my Dad did not get to see. My two wonderful children, my wife and partner, and Nutwood Junction.
But I know that the final lesson he taught me has been accomplished. On that last weekend with my Dad, I had him convinced to retire and to move to California to be a part of my life. We talked about happiness, and at the time, he had started actions to be happy. That lesson, I have internalized, because if you are not happy, then those around you cannot be happy either. Since 1990, my road has been curvy, bumpy, and at times blocked – but as I sit here, I can say I am truly happy. That does not mean that there are not challenges, it just means that I know that we will meet them head-on, together.
So this afternoon, my best friend and I will watch some sports (go Tiger). We will cook some dinner together (I got huge scallops, we have fresh asparagus to bake, and some blue cheese dressing for our salads). The wine is already chilling, and we will watch some Sopranos (or maybe even Saw IV) together. What a glorious day.
2 comments:
You have tears coming to my eyes now too hon.....My parents have been absent my entire life. But Doc's mom she was a special kind of woman, she wasn't my Mom but she treated me like I mattered. She passed away this past Dec. 2nd.....The pain is still fresh. After the funeral a nurse's aide that was her best friend came up to me and said I wanted you to know she was proud of you. We used to talk for hours about you and how well you handled being deaf, how good you were to her son and even Pickles. She was proud of Pickles I used to joke she thought Pickles was her grandkid, Doc never had children......Needless to say I couldn't stop crying the entire hour ride back home. She's the only one I ever talked to with my TTY....
From what I know of you and your wife....I think, no....I know your Dad would of been ferociously proud! (Hugs) Indigo
http://journals.aol.com/rdautumnsage/ravens-lament/
Indigo, sorry for Doc's and your loss. Spent some time at your journal today. Know you are not alone. Ken :o)
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